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Even though the quality of the toys had decreased significantly, It was not until Santa could slid down the chimneys easily, without his big belly stopping his way, that he admitted that he was also affected by the economical situation of the country.
When I came out of the school, I saw one of my weakest student sitting in front of the iron statue of the founder of the school, he was staring at it with a sad and empty look on his eyes. So I, worried, approached him:
"Looking at the statue, uh?" I asked him in a friendly manner.
"Yeah." He answered with a sight.
"Is something wrong?"
"Nope, it's just that sometimes I would like to be made of iron like this statue" he said with melancholy.
"Why?"
"So no one could make me bent down to my knees and I could just remain on my two feet, standing strong."
"Oh, but I can make bent down this statue to its knee."
"How?" he asked me, confused.
"Look" I said, taking a lighter and a key-ring of a miniature of the statue out of my pocket. Then I put the mini statue in the ground in the same way the real statue was standing and, afterwards, I lighted the lighter and put it close to the knees of the key-ring.
"I don't understand."
"Look" I repeated, and after a few seconds, the fire started to melt the knees and legs of the mini statue and it fell to the ground bending down to its knee. My student looked shocked. "Get it?" I asked him, thinking that I had showed him something that didn't need an explanation.
"Yes, yes, thank you!" he told me with a big smile and shining eyes as he grabbed his things and ran out of the school.
The next day, you cannot imagine how much I regretted not explaining my point to my little student, when the fire alarm ran off because he had locked all the student that had bullied him in the gym and had set them on fire.
Even though he was sure that good things come to those who wait, he kept checking the clock every minute that seemed like an eternity.
That day I was tired, so I don't know if this story I'm about to tell is real or if it was just a prank of my imagination; but the other day, while I was in the dinning room of the witch waiting for my best friend, who was getting a tarot reading, between all the images of saints, the crystal balls, masks and the dream catchers that were hanging from the walls, the one that called my attention was one mask made of brown skin, with long black hair, two rounded holes for the eyes, big cheeks and a fine red line that represented the mouth slightly smiling.
When I saw that mask, I was so astonished by it that I couldn't take my eyes off of it during the whole time I was there, in the silence of the dinning room, where one could only hear the tick-tock, of the clock every time a second passed; therefore, you cannot imagine my surprise when, out of the sudden, the fine red line of the mask split into two finer red lines and said with a cold and deadly voice "Hello" but just in that moment, before I could even react to what had just happened, my best friend came out, pissed, of the room where the witch was reading her the tarot, and we left immediately afterwards.
Then, later on, when I told my best friend what had happened to me, she assured me that she hadn't seen any mask, in the dinning room of the witch, like the one I had told her about, and she also told me that I shouldn't worry about it, because it must have been just a cheap trick of that liar and fake witch.
Every time he went back home from work, he took the shortcut through the graveyard; but, this time, since he had worked extra hours and was really late, he decided to take the long road and not to go through the graveyard because there must lots of ghosts and he was afraid of them.
When he got home, he, himself, looked like a ghost, pale and cold, after seeing, through the long road, hundreds of ghosts whom, bored of being always in the graveyard, went out of it to take a walk, leaving the graveyard completely empty to not scare the people who take shortcut through it.
When he was little, the heir, he was never allowed to play with the umbrella inside the house because, according to all the women of the mansion, if he opened the umbrella inside the house his mother would die.
When the heir grew up, he asked his mother to change his last year car for one of the current year; although his mother, for teaching him a lesson of humility, said no. And he, pissed off, ran out of the studio of his mother, went down the stairs and to the lobby, where he picked up a black umbrella and opened it inside the house.
His mother, who had run after him to try to calm him down, saw him opening the umbrella inside the house and was so shocked for what he had done that she had a hear attack and dropped dead in the high part of the stairs.
At five to eight he took out his pillbox, played with it for a moment in his hands and, then, he stared at it, feeling disgusted, angry and impotent; he was sick and tired of depending of that little object and its content to feel good. Then, in his frustration, he threw the pillbox to the floor, just to pick it up, defeated, five minutes later because it was time to take his medication and he had started to feel bad.
When the therapist saw the shades of gray and black on the painting that brought him his patient, to whom he had recommended painting to let him show and express his feelings. He knew, immediately, that he had a lot of work to do.
When the doctor told the king he had the same flu, all the other commoners had, the king felt confused and doubted, for a moment, of the color of his blood. "Is it possible that through my veins run red blood as well as it does in my people?" he asked himself; but then, he looked around and saw the walls of his bedroom covered in Da Vinci's paintings, the floor made of marble, the big chandelier hanging from the ceiling and the big canopied bed.
"No" he answered himself, dissipating all his doubts "What was I thinking? It is impossible that I'm like one of them."
"So, what do you see?" ask the client.
"Nothing."
"How come you see nothing?" demanded the client.
"I'm sorry" answered the witch, worried "but the crystal ball just doesn't show me nothing in your future..."
"You are nothing but a great fake, rip off!" screamed the client, furious, and without letting the witch finish her sentence, she stood up and left the tent.
The next day, the witch read, sadly, the obituary of her client in the morning newspaper. The crystal ball never fails.
When he got home, he found his mother and father fighting and yelling at each other; therefore, without losing a second, he pulled out his headphones from the pocket of his jacket, untangled them, put them on and, magically, his parents vanished in the thin air along theirs fights and yells, leaving him home alone in the peacefulness that only his favorite music could provide.
When she looked out of the window of her office to check if it had stopped raining, she saw a rainbow in the sky and that, towards it, hundreds of monarch butterflies were flying; but before she could smile for such picturesque scene, her phone rang and, forgetting about everything she had just felt and seen, she picked it up, angry, and went on her day like if nothing had happened.
He dreamt about being the best swimmer of the world and winning tons of gold medals at the Olympics; but every time his coach ordered him to make 20 more pools, he whined and did then lazily.
"Yeah, yeah mom, don't worry, I'm fine, everything here is okay, we're fine, yeah, we're fine, I'll call you next week, love ya!"
"Humans are born, grow up, have offspring and die." Said the biology teacher.
And I just looked at her, confused, because if that was the cycle of humans, what is it gonna be of me? I hadn't planned grow up and much less have offspring.
"Did you get the french lesson?"
"Sure, it was really easy."
"You think? I didn't understand a word, what are you doing after class? Could we meet in a coffee or in your home, if you want to, to study together to see if I understand it better with you?"
"Sure, why not? What do you think if we meet...?"
He passed for months and months of pain getting the word "IMMORTAL" tattooed on his back; just for becoming a great feast of tattooed skin for the worms of his grave.
Meanwhile she went to bed crying because she was feeling lonely, thinking that nobody ever could love her; he went to bed with the biggest smile, because he had seen her that day, for only two seconds, pass in front of him in the parking lot of the university.
That day had started in a bad way, he had overslept and he was going late to work. In his way to the bus station, he saw, what it seemed, a clover of four leafs growing up in the pavement, but since he was in a rush, he picked it up without giving it a second look and saved it on the pocket of his shirt.
Miraculously, he got in time to work and, after being congratulated for his latest project, he thought it was all thanks to the lucky clover he had found that morning. His luck had changed.
That day, he kept gently hitting the pocket of his shirt, trusting in the lucky charm he had inside of it, so, he dared to ask for a rise, which was given to him without a doubt. He got a date with the girl he liked and was called from the bank to inform him that his credit had been approved.
Later that day, when he was going back home, he, wanting to abuse of the lucky clover, bought a lottery ticket. He started scratching it and when there was only one number left, he noticed that all the numbers matched the jackpot; but he got so excited that he dropped the coin with which he was scratching the ticket and it fell through the sewer he was standing over. Therefore, when he took out another coin from the pocket of his shirt, he took out, also, the lucky clover, and horrified, he noticed that the clover only had three leafs, like any other regular luckless clover.
After he found out, he tried to think that luck was more about attitude than luck itself, and if he had accomplished all those great things that day just by thinking he was lucky, he was going to keep thinking he was, to scratch the last number of the lottery ticket and win the jackpot; but when he did, he wished he hadn't let the stupid coin fall down the stupid sewer.
Two guys with self-steem problems were sitting in the same table at the party, one had always his phone on his hand, taking selfies ans publishing them on the web so everyone could see how handsome he was; meanwhile the other kept himself hiding from the camera because he thought he was too ugly to be appearing in photos.
Secretly, she always had a sip of whiskey before kissing her ex alcoholic husband, so he would never leave her side nor her kisses.
The boy of the black bile spent his days sitting next to the window, looking, between sighs, without looking the cars and people passing by. He never said a word and if some one asked him what was wrong, he would just sigh and denied everything with his head or with a wave of his hand.
Some have said that they had seen him smile in grey and rainy days; but that's something very difficult to believe, because just by looking at him, he makes that even the most brilliant and radiant yellow bile turn grey and dark.
After the old ladies had said they were sorry for her lost to their neighbor, whom had lost her youngest child because he had committed suicide. The four old ladies of the block wiped their tears and gathered in a corner to have a drink and talk about the deceased.
Old lady No. 1: "I heard the boy killed himself because he had broken up with his girlfriend."
Old lady No. 2: "Really? I heard otherwise, and that the boy had killed himself because he had gotten her pregnant."
Old lady No. 3: "You, old ladies, are so story makers! I was told by someone very close to the family that the boy killed himself because he was gay!"
old lady No.4: "No, you are all wrong, the boy didn't kill himself, he died of overdose, he was a drug addict."
And that's how the old ladies spent the afternoon, talking and making stories about the suicide of the boy that didn't even come close to the reality.
"... that would be all?" asked the cashier.
"Yes."
"Could you give me your name for the bill, please?"
"John Rockefeller."
"Oh, like the cheese?" joked the cashier, smiling.
"No" answered John angry "The cheese is Roquefort, I am Rockefeller and you, lady, are fired."
"What did you say?"
"¡You are fired!"
And doing a sign of his hand to his assistant, the man made all the paperwork and, in less that five minutes, John had purchased the market and had fired the poor cashier.
"Hey! What are you doing?!" screamed the prettiest flower in the park when the selfish one approached her to pick her off the garden.
"Can't you see?" answered the selfish one "I'm going to pick you off the garden to take you home with me."
"But why?" asked the flower "Can't you see I'm the prettiest one around here? If you take me home with you, no one else could see my beauty."
"I know and that's why I'm taking you home, so you'd be all mine and only I could see your beauty without sharing you with anyone else."
So the selfish one did and, a couple of days later, the prettiest flower withered so the selfish one went to the park again to pick the prettiest flower in the garden to make it his.
When she went to the tribunals with her regular shoes, everyone there ignored her; but when she went, wearing her high heels and making tap, tap tap with every step she took, everyone in the tribunals stopped for a moment to help her with her case.
In a kingdom where were only two kids, one fearful while the other fearless, they decided to make a competition to find out who was the bravest of them both.
After the competition finished, and both kids had fought agaisnt dragons, swam in a pond of crocodiles and climbed tree so high that they reached the sky. The jury decided that the bravest kid of the kingdom was not the fearless one, whom had finished the competition first and had get all the obstacles done in the blink of an eye, but the fearful one, whom had come last. Because even though he was afraid of dragons, water, high places and a lot of more things, he had faced his fears and had finished all the obstacles without letting them stop him. And that's what mean to be brave.
While everyone in the kingdom thought that the witch had cursed the Princess because she had locked her with a dragon in a far away tower; the witch thought she was doing her a favor, instead. Because, in that way, she was reassuring that the Princess will only marry with a Prince strong enough and brave enough who would love her enough to go look for her in that tower and fight a dragon for her.
Even though the sun came out and the little birds were singing from the trees again, for him the storm never stopped.
A: "Why are you always alone?"
B: "Because I am a lone wolf."
A: "And that doesn't make you feel, you know, lonely?"
B: "Yes, it does, but that's exactly why I became a lone wolf, because I got tired of waiting for someone to come and make me company, therefore I decided to come out to the world to do whatever I wanted to do all by myself, alone, but still hoping to meet someone along the way.
When the Princess saw from the window of her tower that the Prince who had come to save her was ugly, chubby, and small, and that he had arrived riding a donkey instead of a white stallion; she ran, quickly, to hide under the bed and told the dragon to tell the Prince that she had already been rescued.
In those days when he didn't want to deal with anyone and felt that he couldn't take it anymore: his job, his friends, his life; he wore a yellow warming which read "Beware, emotional." so everyone would be aware of his situation and they could treat him with extreme delicacy.
Before the judge came 10 poachers of lions, and when the judge asked them why they did it, they answered:
"Because hunting is our passion and our favorite sport."
So, the judge, noticing the flame of passion that burned in the eyes of the poachers when they talked of their favorite sport, he sentenced them to hunt a lion; but this time under the same conditions of the animal: without any guns and naked, to make it a fair-play.
During their last hunt, none of the ten poachers enjoyed their favorite sport, because, instead od the flame of passion that burned in their eyes when they talked about hunting, one could only see the fear and horror they were feeling for being unarmed and naked in front of such terrible animal.
While the young boy was walking down the street thinking about his impossible love, he looked up to the sky and noticed a cloud which had the shape of a magic lamp. Using his imagination, the boy rubbed the lamp which made a genie emerged from it, and before the genie could say something, the boy wished three times that his impossible love become possible.
By the time the young boy had finished making his wishes, a furious wind blew away the cloud which had the shape of a magic lamp; therefore, when the young boy remembered that genies were not allowed to make anybody fall in love with anybody else, and looked up to the sky to re-make his wishes, it was too late.
Everything changes, even if it doesn't look like it, like my fears of blood tests. When I was little, it scared me to death taking a blood test, because I was afraid of syringes, and now that I've grown up, it still scares me; but not due to the syringes anymore, but for the results and all the illness I could have caught during for living a wild life during all those years.
He says I'm his heroine...
because I saved him, I saved him, I saved him,
I loved him when everyone hated him,
I saved him, I saved him, I saved him.
He says I'm his heroine...
because I saved him, I saved him, I saved him,
I threw all his syringes and wiped all his lines,
I saved him, I saved him, I saved him.
He says I'm his heroine...
because I saved him, I saved him, I saved him,
I was patient and I never left him,
I saved him, I saved him, I saved him.
He says I'm his heroine...
because I saved him, I saved him, I saved him,
and he tells me that if I had not come, his previous heroin would have killed him.
Dear diary:
How you might well know, I like someone, and I don't know what to do about it, because everyday that pass I like him more, even though I don't even know his name and that all this is really stupid, I feel like I'm living in a poem, although I had never really understood poetry before; because every time I see him, I am head over heels, I can't breath, I feel I die even though my heart beats faster than ever, the neurons of my brain stop working but at the same time send stimulus all over my body; therefore, now I that I can feel all this when I see him, I can understand poetry, because things like this, feelings like this can only be read in poems.
He invented a time machine to try to avoid the death of his beloved one; but no matter how many times he came back and changed the past, he always ended up seeing his beloved one die and die, in one and a thousand different ways.
"Hey, you!"
"Uh?"
"Er... I... I would like to meet you!"
"I don't, bye!"
"Mom, where do we come from?" asked the little platypus to his mother, when he saw his reflection over the lake in which he was drinking.
"What did you say, honey?"
"I asked you where do we come from" he repeated "Do we come from the ducks?"
"No, honey, we do not come from the ducks."
"And the beavers? Do we come from the beavers?"
"No, honey, we do not come from the beavers neither."
"So, where do we come from?"
"We come from there" said the mother, pointing with her paw a white building that was next to the lake.
"From there?" asked the little platypus, shocked "From that white building where that human with a lab coat, carrying in his hand a duck and beaver in a cage, is coming in?"
"Yes, honey, we come from there, and that human you see there, yes, that one who is laughing like a maniac, he is our creator, our God.
When the person he liked got in the elevator with him, he felt that the walls started to close and that the air was missing in the place.
In the morning, when he came out of his apartment, he saw his neighbor coming out of her apartment as well, and he remembered the nightmare he had had the night before.
"Good morning" she said, passing next to him.
"Hi! Good morning, er, eh..." he told her, doubting whether he should tell her, or not, the horrible nightmare he had had the night before in which she got robbed and violently murdered.
"Uh? Do you need something?" She asked him, smiling.
"No, no, it's nothing, I'm sorry I bothered you, have a nice day!" he said, and walked away thinking how evil it would have been to take away the big smile his neighbor had on her face, by telling her such horrible nightmare in which she were cut in pieces.
"Dreams are just that, dreams, they're not, and they do not become real" he said to himself as he got in the elevator.
At night, when he finally got home and turn on the news, he froze when he heard that his nightmare had come true, his neighbor had been brutally murdered, and since then, he regrets everyday not having told his neighbor about the nightmare, and he wonders if she'd still be alive if he had told her.
The heart-breaker phoenix loved to play with fire, caring little if he get burned, because he knew too well, that if that would happen, he would rise from his own ashes.
When she realized she was becoming more and more like her mother, she decided to get a sterilization to never have a daughter like herself.
When the first zombie woke up after a couple of months after his death, he realized that all his flesh was fetid and filled by worms, therefore he picked up the phone and made a call:
"911 what's your emergency?"
"He...llo I thi...nk I'm de...ad!" he said, trying to sound the more human he could "Co...me and get ... me!"
"Ha-ha-ha, very funny sir, we loved being pranked like that, I hope come alive soon, bye!" said the girl of 911 sarcastically, and hung up the phone abruptly.
"Here too?! Look! Look! That's the guy I told you about, I've been running into him everywhere lately, I think he is stalking me, I'm starting to get a little bit scared" She told her friend; while the guy she was talking about, was telling his friend the same thing about her.
Every day he spent hours and hours in front of the sink, trying to wash away the stains of blood that remained in his hands after having murdered his brother a couple of years ago; but no matter how many times he washed his hands, nor how much soap he used, the stains of blood would not go away.
And just because they cannot see them, nor hear them, they say I'm crazy.
As soon as she came out of her cocoon, the pretentious butterfly let her pass behind, and now, when the ugly caterpillars approach her to ask her if it hurt to became a beauty butterfly, she ignore them because she doesn't like to be seen with ugly and fat caterpillars.
While she was waiting for her layer to arrive to sign the divorce papers, she remembered the day her husband proposed her, and how, that same morning, before he had come with the ring, she had been very sad, because she had spent several hours at the garden, picking up flowers and pulling out its petals asking them if he loved her or if he loved her not; and every time she did it, all the flowers agreed that he loved her not.
Decided to have fun all and every single day of summer, little Tommy sat next to the window and had fun all the afternoon making imaginary races with the drops of rain that crashed against the glass, and which, then, rapidly, rolled down to the window sill; he wasn't going to let the stormy day, which should have been a sunny one, ruin one of his summer days.
And just as his parents told him, he had been tricked, the beans never germinated.
After having him three days at hell, the Devil, Lucifer, decided to send Jesus back with his Father to Heaven, because he was such a killjoy.
While all the other bears jumped into the river to hunt the fatter and more delicious salmons, the lazy bear sat next to river, waiting for a clueless salmon to jump off of it and land near him to eat it.
The other bears, seeing what their friend was doing, criticized him and roared him things that only bears can understand; but the lazy bear ignored them, and kept waiting next to river for a lucky strike.
At night, all the other bears went back to their caves, happy and proud of the salmons they had hunted during the hard day of work; and the lazy bear, just like them, also, went back to his cave, happy and proud of the two skinny salmons that had jumped off the river that day and that had satisfied his hunger in a easy way, without doing much work.
Every night before falling asleep, he spent hours and hours rolling in the bed, thinking about life, it's meaning and sense; but all this thoughts depressed him, because he always came to the conclusion that life was worthless, because in the end, we all are going to die.
Tired of all this, he decided to start an strict diet in which he made his last meal at 6 p.m. therefore, at night, while he spent his hours rolling in the bed before falling asleep, instead of thinking about life, he thought about what he was going to have for breakfast the next morning; ans since then, he was very happy in his ignorance.
And when we signed up the divorce papers, he took half of the car, of the house, of my bank accounts, and he also took half of my heart.
"I'm bored, I hate life, everything is always the same, so predictable, nothing interesting ever happen" he thought, laying on the couch while watching the ceiling fan spin.
Then, his cellphone ringed, a text message: "Come 2 my home, were having a partey!"
"That's so annoying!" he thought and he didn't even care to answer.
His cellphone, then, ringed again, but this time a call:
"Hey! What are you doing? Let's go to the movies, they're giving this new film which looks amazing!"
"Movies are so stupid!" He thought and hung up the phone without even saying a word.
"I'm bored, I hate life, everything is always the same, so predictable, nothing interesting ever happen" he thought, laying on the couch while watching the ceiling fan spin.
I was on the rocking chair reading the newspaper when I heard the voice of my little boy calling me "Dad! Dad! Dad! Come help me! I'm down here!.."
When he finally stopped calling me, I put the newspaper down, closed my eyes for a brief moment, and got up to the bedroom; but when my wife saw me, pale and sweated, she asked me with her particular tone "Again?" question, which I answered with a nod of my head, while I sat on the bed to take off my shoes.
"You should go see a doctor, a priest, or a witch, maybe, I don't know, to have an opinion about it" she suggested me, but I just waved my hand in the air, letting her know that I had heard her, but that I would ignore her suggestion, and without saying a word, I lied on the bed and fell asleep.
After the previous King had lost the battle and his kingdom, the new King cut, wildly, with his claws, the mane of the previous one and put it on, over his own head, with pride, so every-lion in the pride knew that he was now, the new leader.
When he got to his office, on Monday, after a long and exhausting weekend, he noticed that over his desk lied a letter addressed to him, and when he opened it, he found inside of it, his dismissal and a small bronze key with which he could unlock the shackles that imprisoned him.
Shooting-star was a unicorn, who, ever since was little, was obsessed with the horse racing, therefore, every Sunday, he escaped from the Unicorn Valley to go to the hippodrome to see the horses race.
As the years passed by, Shooting-star felt that it wasn't enough just to see the horses race, he wanted to be part of one race himself, to know what did it feel to run faster than every-horse else and win it or lose it; whith this idea in his mind, Shooting-star organized a race in the Unicorn Valley, but none of his fellow unicorns wanted to be part of it, therefore Shooting-star felt super sad.
A Sunday, while Shooting-star was on his way to the hippodrome, he found in the woods a tall, thin, blonde woman, who was wearing a red short-dress, lying on the ground, unconscious; without giving her much attention, Shooting-star focused on the small red bag that was next to the woman, and after searching it for a minute, he found, between a bunch of bills, a nail file, which gave him an amazing idea, so he picked it up and ran away from the woods.
That same day, after coming back of the hippodrome, Shooting-star put his plan to action, and started to file his long and beautiful horn; even though all his friends called him crazy and tried to stop him, Shooting-star kept filing and filing his horn until he had filed it all. Looking exactly as a regular horse, Shooting-star, went to the hippodrome the next Sunday, where, luckily, he found a Jockey whom horse had injured and wasn't going to be able to run in the race; but when the man saw Shooting-star, he fell in love of his white and pure fur and decided to run the race on it.
Getting the first place, and beating all records, Shooting-star became the most famous racehorse, because, since then, he hasn't lost any single race.
When he heard that his friends were lost in the desert, he went to look for them; but he ended up lost, as well, in the dry and yellow sand of the desert; just before dying of dehydration. he saw, afar, the mirage of his friends feasting in a oasis, therefore he left his physical body to become vulture food, and his soul ran to join the party with them as part of the mirage.
"Today's practice is about writing a story using these words: baby, dragon, bank, married, chocolate, lottery" said the professor.
When the smartest kid of the class read his story out loud:
The other day, while I was taking my dragon for a walk in the park, I sat on the same old bank I always do, upon the name of a married couple that were supposed to love each other "for ever" While I was sitting there, I heard the cry of a baby under the bank, so I bent down, picked the little kid into my arms, and realized that he was holding a little note that reads "There's something inside of me" Therefore, without double think it, I pulled out my Swiss knife, cut-open the stomach of the baby, and to my surprise, inside of it, floating in a small pool of digested chocolate, I found the winning lottery ticket of last week; then I grabbed my dragon and ran away of the park to go reclaim my prize.
"So? Aren't you gonna tell me your name?" asked the dying man.
"No" replied the demon.
"Not even now that I'm dying?"
"No."
"I cannot believe that after all those years we have spent together, and everything we've been through, you still don't trust me enough to tell me your name."
"Shut up, I won't tell you" grumbled the demon "and go die already, I've been waiting for too long to finally devour your soul."
"I miss him." She said.
"What?! Are you outta your mind? How can you miss him?!" said her friend.
"Yes, I miss him, he was really nice with me, he bought me flowers and chocolates..."
"Yeah! Every time he cheated on you!"
"... He invited me to dinner ... "
"And he flirted with the waitress!"
"... and he hugged me really tight and, was also, such a good kisser."
"Yeah he hugged you as he yelled at you in front of his friends!"
"Damn! But you only remember his bad side!"
"And you, the good one!"
Even though they had moved all their belongings to the new house; when she came back to the old house to check if everything was ready to the sale, she realized that it was, still, full of memories.
Every time that they fought, the couple whom had more than twenty years married, took a walk to the park where, once, when they were young, craved a little heart with their initials inside of it in the bark of a tree; therefore, when they passed by that tree and saw that their initials were still there, they remembered all the happy memories they had lived together and make-up.
"Are you sure this is gonna hurt him? asked the ex-girlfriend to the witch.
"Yes, my darling, here, take this" said the witch, giving her a bunch of needles "let it go, and make him pay for what he did to you."
When he told her his deepest and darkest fetish to his wife-to-be, he knew he had choose the perfect woman to marry; because what she said before such confession was that she didn't mind at all, because she would die for him, anyways.
Even though I couldn't see anything, I heard a voice calling my name in the dark, I didn't know where it came from, but I decided to follow it up, careless of where it would take me, because following that unknown voice was better than wander around, aimlessly, in the dark.
"Turn the lights off on your way out."
"Really? Are you sure?"
"Yep" answered the little kid.
"But, and what about the monsters? Wouldn't they come to attack you with the lights off?"
"Nope, yesterday I realized I'm stronger than them."
"Really? How did you find that out?"
"Yesterday I went into the wardrobe and smacked the monster that lived there, I could beat the monster of the wardrobe, I know I can also beat any other monster that come to attack me."
"Very well, son, I'll turn the lights off in way out, then."
When the rabbit and the turtle came back home, tired and hungry due to the race they had just had, they saw, afar, a little farm that cultivated fruits and vegetables.
When they passed by the farm, the rabbit realized that the carrots were ready to be eaten, and he said to the turtle:
"Hey, turtle, what do you say we jump off the fence of the farm and grab a couple of carrots to restore the energy we lost in the race?"
"Are you crazy, rabbit?" said the turtle, exalted "that's stealing!"
"Yeah, yeah, but it would only be a couple of carrots, the farm's owner will never realized it, what do you say? we do it?"
"NO!" answered the turtle "I won´t do it, you go, rabbit, if you want; but don't drag me into your misdeeds."
"OK" said the rabbit "but I won't bring any carrots for you, and then don't be asking me for a bite of mine."
Then, the turtle saw how the rabbit approached the fence and jumped it off using his two strong back legs; he, then, landed on the other side of the fence, and came near the carrots stealthily; but, as soon as he grabbed the leafs of a carrot, to pull it off the earth, PUM! the rabbit's head blew in a thousands pieces.
"I CAUGHT YOU WITH THE PAWS ON MY CARROTS, YOU FILTHY THIEF!" screamed the human that had came out of the farm and now was running to the rabbit's body that lied dead on the ground.
After seen all this, the turtle came back to his home as fast as he could, and he, now, tells the story of the thief-rabbit to everyone in the woods, so all the animals could learn that stealing is a bad thing.
Even though Christmas had already passed, the naughty boy was still receiving coal everyday from Santa due to his misbehavior that year; but the boy, instead of feeling sad and blue for not getting any toys, was happy and content with the coal he get, because those kept him warm during the cold winter.
*Click*
I heard the sound of the trigger and closed my eyes, waiting for the gun to shoot and blow away my brains; but it didn't happen, the thief had forgotten to load his gun, and taking advantage of the situation, I escaped from his arms and doing a flip I took away the gun from his hand, the roles had changed, and now it was I who was holding the gun, pointing to his head, I loaded, rightly, the gun, put my finger around the trigger, and I looked at the thief's eyes, asking myself if I, a good man, was gonna be capable of pulling the trigger and blow away the brains of the thief who would have blew mines just a few seconds ago.
*Clink, clink, clink, clink* was the sound, the forks and knives made against the porcelain plates, and was, also, the only sound that was heard during the whole Christmas dinner.
One day, tired of being told what to do, how to act, what to eat, and how to dress, the Princess, decided to run away and live her life like a commoner; but after passing a couple of days outside the castle, and having to work hard to gain her daily bread, the Princess, came back to the castle and lived happily ever after.
Luciano had a bag full of colored candies, but those candies were not regular candies, they were magical candies, and each of the color of the candies would make a different reaction to the person who eat them; that's why Luciano always gave red candies to the girls he liked, because the red ones make the girls like him back; to his friends, Luciano gave them the blue ones, which made them trust him; to his parents, he gave violet candies, because those calmed them and made them forgive him for his naughtiness; and, finally, too his enemies, Luciano gave them the black candies that were on the bottom of his bag.
In the desert, the dying bull rose his eyes to the sky before passing out, trying to search something that would guide him through death; but the only thing he saw up there, were the circles of death that the vultures were drawing above him, while they were waiting, anxiously, his death to finally eat his flesh.
The first time the kid went on a plane, he spent all his trip trough the sky, waving through the circular window, hoping to wave back at the other kids of on the ground that, like him, always waved to the planes that were passing by.
"And what do you think of this one?" she asked to her friend showing her a red turtleneck.
"I love it! You should, totally, buy it."
"I know, I will!"
"Yeah, buy it, but hey, can I ask you something?"
"Yes, sure."
"Why have you recently bought and wore so many turtlenecks? Is it a new trend I haven't heard about?"
"No, no, no, it's nothing of the sort" she replied, blushing "my late liking for the turtleneck is because my boyfriend is obsessed with vampires, and well..." she said, pausing for a brief moment before pulling down her turtleneck, so her friend could see with her own eyes the reason of her new fashion trend.
"Dear God, please, send me to heaven once I die, because if living on earth isn't hell, I don't even want to imagine how it would be to spend the eternity down there, amen."
"Hahaha! You? FAMOUS WRITER? Hahaha, C'mom, don't make me laugh! I've read what you write and it's nothing but trash."
In the White House, no one noticed that little golden fish of the president blinked every now and then.
When everyone had gathered up all the Halloween decoration, the poor Jack started to feel lost again when he no longer saw the lights of the pumpkins leading the way.
When the earthquake started, the crying of the baby who was lying on the ground, because she had fallen down learning how to walk, became into a loudly laugh.
"Don't drink" he whispered to my ear at the same time that he kissed my cheek and passed the golden cup into my hands. I, following his advice, faked drinking, and then I passed the golden cup to the person next to me, whispering the same words I was told, before giving him the kiss on the cheek.
Minutes later, only I and the man before me were the ones who remained standing up in the grand circle of people; everyone else had drunk from the golden cup and lied dead on the floor.
One day he woke up being able to see demons, and when he went out to the street, he was surprised to see all the demons regular people were carrying in their backs.
Her heart raced, when she saw his face for the first time in the airport.
"I never loved you" he whispered to her ear, after she had finally gave him her virginity.
When alchemist served the dinner in a silverware made of gold, all his guest asked him:
"How did you get this amazing silverware?"
"The silverware? Well... uh... This silverware was a gift the king gave me for doing him some favor, yeah, yes, it was gift from the king" answered, nervously, the alchemist, while he made sure with his hand, over his pocket, that the little scarlet stone were there.
In a hot and sunny day of summer, Isaac sat under the shadow of an apple tree to refresh himself; and while he was amusing himself, seeing how the leafs of the tree slowly fell to the ground every time a wind blew, an idea, like fallen from the apple tree, came to his mind.
When everyone stood up from their seats and raised their glasses up to toast for the health of the King; the Prince, whom had been poisoning his father to obtain the crown; stayed sit, crossed his arms firmly, and didn't even hold a glass in his hands.
"And remember guys" said the artist to his students "in the theater, it is easier to play the roles of happy people, because the human being, when is sad, it is used to hide his sadness and pretend to be happy to keep the appearances; therefore, playing roles of sad people is harder, because when the human being is happy, it is not used to hide it, but to do otherwise and tell everyone about it."
When he finally could get out of the pit he had lived all his life, the daylight blinded him for a brief moment; and in that brief moment, his captor realized that he had climbed his way out, and ran to push him back to the cold and dark pit again.
"Common kitty!" said the curious boy, carrying his cat in his arm and going down the basement of the abandoned house, from which only one came back alive.
He dropped, disgusted, the sword with which he had pierced the chest of his enemy, and leaving him half-dead in floor, turned his back to him and walked back to his carriage.
"Sir, your sword!" said his second.
"That sword is useless" he said proudly "because it is now stained with the blood of that mongrel; tomorrow I'l get another one."
When he, who didn't know how to swim, fell into the deepest part of the pool, remembered that in those kind of situations, one must keep calm, therefore little by little, he sank and sank until he reached bottom of the pool, and there, he couldn't keep his breath any longer and died drowned.
And nobody in the pool noticed what had happened until his cold and inert body, came floating to the surface of the pool.
The Princess was coming down, running, the stairs of the castle, she was very excited for the arrival of the Prince who would be her fiancé; but when she saw him coming through the big doors of the hall, she stopped right where she was, turned around, climbed the stairs back as fast or even faster than how she was coming down of them, and locked herself in her chamber in the highest tower of the castle, from where one could hear her say between sobs:
"I rather kiss a frog! I rather kiss a frog!"
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
"A!" cried the guilty man.
_ _ _ _ A _ _ _ A _
He stood up between the debris and looked around, the storm had ceased, but instead of feeling calmed, what he felt, was desperation, when he saw that everything was destroyed.
"I should totally have a reality" he told himself after something very unusual and funny had happened to him, without knowing, that in a planet of a far away galaxy, an alien was rolling in the floor laughing after seeing what had just happened to him.
I was riding a foal who was running unstoppable to the finish line, when I remembered, how in my days of youth I went out for a ride through the meadow till I reached the orchard, where I used to pick a flower of a delicious smell, I stopped there to watch the clouds and pet my horse; I also remembered that when I got back to the city I used to trow a coin in the main square's fountain, where I always found a lady of yellow skin like a quince, to whom I always said hi taking my hat off; but she, she always ignored me, because I have never appeared on the newspaper, and that was the kind of men she liked, those who have been to great theaters and that were famous, because she wanted to live big, in a building as high as the sky; but then, I came back to the reality when I heard the public claiming my name, because I had won the race, then they took me a photo which would be in the first page of the newspaper of tomorrow, and I wonder if that lady would remember when she saw my face in the newspaper of tomorrow.
Ever since the Ugly Princess heard the Spanish saying "Para ser bella, hay que ver estrellas" she started to spend all her nights in the balcony, looking at the stars with the hope that when the dawn came, she would be a little bit less ugly.
Everyday when I went out of the house, I saw an old lady sitting in the staircase of the house in face of mine, and I and everyone of the block always waved to the old lady from the afar.
A day, during dinner, It occurred to me to tell my parents:
"Have you thought that someday when the old lady, of the house in face of ours, die, appears sitting in the staircase like if nothing had happened?"
"What old lady are you talking about?"
"The old lady of the house in face of ours, the one who is always sitting in the staircase and waves to everyone who passes by."
"But, son, the house in face of us is abandoned since the old lady who used to live there died when you were two."
Girlfriend 2: What?! That bastard hit you again? No, girlfriend, no, you have to leave him, this cannot go on.
Girlfriend 3: It's true, girlfriend, you should not let that monkey hit you, leave him, I am sure you can find someone better, you're young, beautiful, leave him and find some one else.
Girlfriend 1: But what if I don't find anyone else.
Girlfriend 3: Don't think like that, I know you can find a man a thousand times better than that bastard.
Girlfriend 2: Yeah, my friend, leave him.
Girlfriend 1: All right, all right, I'll broke up with him and I'll find someone else.
Two months later.
Girlfriend 3: Have you heard?
Girlfriend 2: No, what happened?
Girlfriend 3: The new boyfriend our girlfriend found killed her in a jealous rage.
Girlfriend 2: WHAT?!!
He was feeling his mind so foggy, that, despite the sun was shining brightly in the sky, he felt that a storm was gonna break in any moment.
"Son, this is a knife, and this, this is a dagger, learn the difference."
"What is the difference, dad? To me they're both the same."
"The difference is figurative, son, because in your life, a knife could cut you, hurt you; but a dagger, a dagger could kill you."
When the big celebrity was walking in an empty ally and stomp, mindlessly, over a crack with her high heels, she fell hardly against the ground; but she got up quickly and walk away, smiling, because no one had seen her.
When she got back to her House in Bel Air and turned on her computer, she saw, horrified, how her name was in all the tabloids because the pictures and videos of her fall were on he internet and that was what everyone was talking about.
Drowning in her depression, Janette, decided to to take her life, because she thought that nobody cared for her and that nobody loved her; and she was right, because no one noticed she was gone until three years later when, by chance, the janitor of the building she used to live in, found her dead body hanging from the ceiling of her apartment.
Out of the sudden, in a regular day, it started to rain gummy-bears of all the colors and flavors one could imagine; and all the children stopped doing what they were doing to go out and play under the gummy-bears rain, opening their mouths up to the sky to catch and eat all the gummy-bears they could, until all their milk teeth got cavities and fell from their mouths.
"What is it that like the most about me?" He asked her.
'Your car and your beach house' She thought but answered instead:
"Everything, your eyes, your smile, everything! I love the way you are, how you treat me and the way you make feel!"
One day when Schrodinger's black cat, who was always prying around the house, snuck himself into the box.
When the glowing lips of the angel touched his forehead, a warm light invaded his body and he felt sure that the darkness that lived inside his heart, someday, will be just part of his dark past.
"Get those hands away from the keyboard and put them behind your head!" screamed the policeman when he broke out into his room without even knocking "you have the right to remain silent, anything you post on twitter or facebook, can, and will be used against you!" continued the policeman as he handcuffed him and took him away from the computer.
"C'mmon girls! Hurry up! We're running late!" urged the witch to her little witches from the door of her chocolate house.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHGGGGG!!!!!!!" Screamed the girl who was inside the box when the magician inserted the first sword into it.
In the room 16 of the cheapest motel:
"Aaugh! What are you doing?" I asked her.
"I'm marking my territory" she whispered to my ear, and kept on biting me and kissing hard in my neck until she made a hickey.
Year: 5k33
Spatial base: M-4-R-5
"Since the server that provides Infranet is overheated, our scientist have analyzed the problem and have discovered that this is happening because the capacity of it have passed it limit by one; and the only way to fix it, is by unplugging one of us out of the server, which will be chosen randomly..."
But when he heard the announce of the leader of the base, the human, J-35-U-5, was moved by the faces of horror of all the people who was hearing the announce in the main square of the spatial base, and did something no one had made in more than five thousands years.
"Me!" he screamed "Unplug me!"
From the point of view of a young and single man: "Ugh! I hate this city, it's so small and boring, there's nothing to do in here!"
From the point of view of a young man in love: "This city is amazing, it's so big, and have so many places I wanna go with my darling that I don't think this lifetime would be enough for us to explore it completely!"
When the nurse called my name and gave me the sealed envelope, I opened it with shaking hands, and I shocked when I saw the results:
Ever since Saint Peter bought a computer, the long queues to get into Heaven are now shorter, because with just a click, Saint Peter can check the internet history of the souls who wants to get into Heaven and send them to Hell.
*Cling, crash!
When they heard the sound, they shut up instantly, and when they opened the door to see what have happened, they only found, in the empty hallway, the broken pieces of a glass cup.
"Hahahahaha"
A laugh was heard in the distance, and everyone was surprised that there were still someone who could be able to laugh despite everything they were going through.
He: Honey, I'm so tired, I'm going to take a little rest before dinner, could you let me know when is ready? Couldn't you?
She: Okay, honey, I'd let you know.
...
She: Honey, dinner is ready!
She: Honey, come down to eat!!!
She: Honey?
She: Honey, dinner is ready already!!!!
She: Honey?
She: Honey, wake up, dinner is ready!!!
She: Honey!!!!
She: HONEY... NO... WHY???!!!
Once upon a time, there was an small town that lived under the fear of a terrible beast that hide in a cave of one of the mountains nearby.
One day, a brave young man decided to go kill the beast; but when he entered the cave where it lived, he didn't find anything but an white goat sleeping soundly; and, worried for the animal to be kill in the return of the beast, the young man took the goat with him back to the small town.
That night, the beast attacked the small town and killed, bloodily, everyone, but the young man, who, when he woke up the following morning, found the white goat covered in stains of blood and sleeping soundly.
And when I put on my glasses and I could see her better, I fell in love immediately.
Eve was seeing the new priest of the Church in the same way her ancestress saw the apple tree in the Eden.
There was one lawyer that was so good doing his work, that everybody called him the diabolic lawyer; because he always found a way to win all the cases that showed up to him.
"I'm so good because I had a good teacher" he said every time he won a case, remembering the wise words of his great teacher, who had taught him how to win all the cases by saying: "Winning a case is like doing that the wishes the humans make when they sell me their souls came out totally wrong..."
In order that Saint Peter could be able to take his vacations, the Devil, very kindly, offered his dear Cerberus to God so it could cover the place of Saint Peter while he was vacationing; but during that time, not one soul else passed through the gates of Heaven; not because Cerberus were doing bad his job, but because everyone was preferring to go to Hell when they saw such horrible dog guarding the gates of Heaven.
When I heard the screaming of help, I was reading a book in front of the chimney; but I dropped it instantly and ran to the window to see what was happening and what my eyes saw left me speechless: a man was stabbing repeatedly the girl.
I tried to scream; but no sound came out of my mouth. I tried to go out to help her; but my legs were frozen and I couldn't move. I tried to pick up the phone and call the police; but my mind was blank and I couldn't remember the emergency number. I tried to help her, I really tried; but the fear and the shock I felt at the moment were stronger than my good intentions.
I approached, stealthily, to the stroller where the baby was eating his candy, I extended my arm and tried to steal it; but as soon as I pulled the candy, the baby started to cry and everyone around fixed their eyes upon me.
I, ashamed, dropped the candy, and shaking my hands in the air said "What? I was just proving a theory" and walked away from the crime scene, while being judged by everyone who had seen me trying to take a candy from a baby.
While we were vacationing in Japan:
"Quick! Call an ambulance!"
"How?! I don't know, I'm callin' the 9-1-1 but it doesn't work! What is the emergency number here?!"
"We're in Japan, everything is inverse here!"
"Uh? How..."
"1-1-9! Call the 1-1-9!!!"
I opened my eyes and saw the sun shining brightly in the sky, thirsty and sweaty, I gathered the little strength I had left and managed to get on my feet to keep walking through the yellow and hot dessert; after I had given a few steps, I saw, in the distance, an oasis, and excited, I ran towards it; but the more I ran to it, the further it got; it was a mirage, and, hopeless, I let myself fall onto the hot yellow sand, unable to continue.
When I woke up, I was in the hospital near my house, with a solution connected into my veins and a thermometer under my tongue.
"H-E-L-P!!!" Wrote the castaway in a piece of paper, put it into a glass bottle, and threw it, hopeful, into the see.
"H-E-L-P!!!" Read a sailor in a piece of piece of paper, he had found in a bottle, while he was walking through the beach, then, he looked, sadly, into the vast see and told to himself: "Those castaway never learn."
"How do you do to make your hair look so perfectly messy? What products do you use on it?" I asked my best friend, with curiosity "I've tried everything! Gel, spray, cream, and I never make my hair look like yours."
"Hahahahaha! Are you really asking me this?"
"Yes! How do you do?"
"Hahahahaha, I don't know, man, with magic, I guess."
"Com'on! Tell me your secret, what do you do to your hair and what products do you use on it?"
"Hahahahaha, it's true, it's magic, man!"
"Well, okay, don't tell me if you don't want to."
"No, it's true, look..."
And I never expected what I saw next, my friend fixed his messy hair with one hand, then, he withdrew from his pocket a golden pearl, he brought it to his lips, whispered something I didn't understand, and then, extending his arm, he screamed: "Come to me!" Immediately, a circle of shiny light with a pentagram inside of it appeared in the place where he was standing, right after a burst of heavy wind surrounded him for a few seconds, and then, when it was over, the hair of my friend looked perfectly messy.
"I love you, Tim" whispered his girlfriend on his right ear.
"And what about me?!"
"I love you, too, Thy" she whispered on his left ear.
In the middle of the ocean, a castaway yelled to heaven:
"WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO ME, GOD? WHY? WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS? I KNOW THAT YOU ARE UP THERE, WATCHING ME, TESTING ME; BUT GOD, PLEASE, HELP ME, I CANNOT TAKE IT ANYMORE!"
Meanwhile in the heaven:
"TAKE TWO CARDS! YOU DIDN'T SAY UNO!" Said God to the Devil.
"I said it! You didn't hear me!"
"No! You didn't say it, take two cards!"
"But, but..."
"But, nothing, don't try to cheat again, take two cards and continue playing."
If you knew my wife, you would think, just as everyone else who knows her, that she is the sweetest and most adorable of all, and that she wouldn't even be able to kill a fly; and well, I cannot complain that people think that of her, because, my wife is really adorable and charming, until she sees me talking to another woman, then everything turns ugly, very ugly, so ugly that I have, even, lost the count of how many corpses we have buried in the back garden of our house.
"Why did you kill her?"
"Because she knew too much."
"She knew too much, about what?"
"About everything! Haven't you seen her grades?!"
During the day, he couldn't stop thinking how much he hated the city because of how noisy and crowded it was; but during the night, he just sat next to the window of his penthouse to admire the city for how beauty and lit it was.
The sound of the front door opening made them stop what they were doing.
"My husband has arrived!"
"What?! But wasn't he coming back until six?!"
"Yes, I don't know what may have happened, come, quick, hide under the bed, I can feel him coming by the stairs."
And when the man hid himself under the bed, she got up from the bed and ran to the door, where her husband has just arrived, and throwing herself into his arms exclaimed:
"What took you so long?! I almost have sex with him?!
"I'm sorry, darling, the neighbor stopped me for a second to talk about her cats" he said, calmed, while he pushed the mysterious button that was next to the door, and when he did it, from the floor under the bed started to come out thousands of needles that killed the man who was hiding there in just a couple of seconds.
And when the one-eyed person walked in the the land of the blind, his face lit.
"Is everything okay?" I asked him when I saw him sigh while he was staring out of the window.
"Uh? Ah! Yeah, yes, everything is fine, I'm okay, don't worry" he answered me and then, he gave me a fake smile for me to calm down.
"Come, get closer to me, Icarus, nothing is going to happen to you, I swear." Whispered the Sun to Icarus while he was flying through the sky, knowing very well what would happen to the young boy if he got too close to him.
Mary never went out without her hat, and while out, she never took it off, so, as time passed by, the people of the town started to create stories about what was hiding Mary under her hat.
"Under Mary's hat, she hides a terrible monster with seven eyes and two heads" some may say.
"There's absolutely nothing under Mary's hat, not even hair, because she uses her hat all the time to hide her baldness" Others may say.
But the truth was that under Mary's hat was, indeed, something hidden; but it wasn't a monster nor her baldness, it was a little sunflower which had grown on the top of Mary's head due to the sunflower seed she had accidentally eaten when she was little.
Shyly, the little kid raised his hand and waved to the ghosts that were already living in his new apartment.
Orion raised up his head and watch, sadly, the star constellations; his pants were falling loose.
One day, my father, the shoemaker, tired of seeing me cry because I always came at last in the races of the school, made me a pair of running shoes with a pair of little wings on its sides, with which, according to him, I'd never lose another race; but I never knew if the running shoes worked or not, because I never wore them, I was ashamed of wearing a pair of running shoes with little wings on its sides.
In a abandoned house:
"If you tell us where it is, and all you know about it, we won' kill ya!"
"It's alright, alright, I'll talk, but please, don't kill me, what you're looking for is..."
"Are ya sure of what ya sayin'?"
"Yes! That's all I know, please, let me go, I beg you!"
"Kill 'im!"
"WHAT?! But..!"
BANG!
At the site.
"Boss, we've searched all the place and still don't find it"
"That bastard lied to us!"
365 Microfictions, Flash Fictions, Micro-Stories and Short Stories written by Sir Helder Amos Copyright © 2011 -- Template created by O Pregador -- Powered by Blogger Templates
